For Smart Women who need a good laugh and to Guys who can handle it. ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
OFFICE ARITHMETICSmart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
SHOPPING MATHA man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife
can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
HAPPINESSTo be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and
love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not
try to
understand her at all.
LONGEVITY Married men live longer than single men, but married men
are a lot
more willing to die.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he
doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and
she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man
says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED: Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in
the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They
stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at
funerals.