the chuck norris thread

• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:21

  Chuck Norris beat the Sun in a staring contest.
• Xephone_xenon

  16 Sep 07, 20:21

  Originally posted by yong93:

  I would rather watch Lucky Star ...

  x2
• toyota-corolla

  16 Sep 07, 20:26

  Chuck Norris can divide any number with 0.
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:26

  Originally posted by toyota-corolla:

  Chuck Norris can divide any number with 0.

  And the answer would be one, one roundhouse kick to your face!
• BadzMaro

  16 Sep 07, 20:35

  Originally posted by DjMatrix:

  And the answer would be one, one roundhouse kick to your face!

  Make it x2 for double posting his moves...
• norm

  16 Sep 07, 20:36

  Who is this old man. Never heard of him.
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:39

  Originally posted by BadzMaro:

  Make it x2 for double posting his moves...

  Chuck Norris can strike a match on a bar of soap.
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:39

  Originally posted by norm:

  Who is this old man. Never heard of him.

  Chuck NorrisÂ’ IQ can be expressed simply as a sideways eight.
• RaTtY8l

  16 Sep 07, 20:44

  global warming is caused by chuck norris yawning while hes feeling bored
  
  
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:46

  Originally posted by RaTtY8l:

  global warming is caused by chuck norris yawning while hes feeling bored
  
  

  Chuck Norris can clap with one hand.
• khali

  16 Sep 07, 20:47

  Originally posted by norm:

  Who is this old man. Never heard of him.

  He is from your grandfather's generation.
• tomsss

  16 Sep 07, 20:49

  Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
  
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:50

  Originally posted by khali:

  He is from your grandfather's generation.

  Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:51

  Originally posted by tomsss:

  Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
  

  Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
• laurence82

  16 Sep 07, 20:52

  when chuck norris farts...who cares?
  
  
• pervertboi

  16 Sep 07, 20:52

  
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 20:53

  Originally posted by laurence82:

  when chuck norris farts...who cares?
  
  

  Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and accidentally ran into Chuck Norris while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.
• tomsss

  16 Sep 07, 20:56

  Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won
• Shotgun

  16 Sep 07, 21:00

  When the US Army started their "Army of One" ad campaign, everyone thought it was a Chuck Norris movie.
• pervertboi

  16 Sep 07, 21:01

  
  
  
• DjMatrix

  16 Sep 07, 21:01

  Originally posted by tomsss:

  Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won

  Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
• pervertboi

  16 Sep 07, 21:02

  
  
  
• pervertboi

  16 Sep 07, 21:02

  
  
• pervertboi

  16 Sep 07, 21:03

  
  
  
  
• pervertboi

  16 Sep 07, 21:03